Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
