This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
