We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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