Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Randomize
