It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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