I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
