So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
