I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
So much rum. So many feels.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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