Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Randomize