Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
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