FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
