The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
