i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Randomize
