i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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