Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
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