She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
honey bunches of taint.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
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