its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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