Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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