Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
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