Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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