We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
