Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
