Dual....:-)
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
