Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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