Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
