Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
This toilet bowl is my home.
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