I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize