Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
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