I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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