dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize
