Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
You may now shotgun with the bride
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
