My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
