She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
