Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
