Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize