YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
