one might say we're banned from that church
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
