After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize