so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
she pinky promised me she was 18
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I am mentally ready for anal.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
