Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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