What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
