My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
And then my night got REAL pukey
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Randomize
