Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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