dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
