The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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