you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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