After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
