I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
