I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
