I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
